Carol Eldridge Blog

BILL'S IN REHAB AT CHRISTIAN CARE CENTER

2012-02-11T09:16:00.000-08:00

Bill had lumbar surgery on Dec 12 and was doing fine for about a month. But then two blod clots developed, one in each lung and I had to go to the ER. Went from there to Rehab at CCC and still there. But doing good. No longer on oxcegyn and physical therepy is going good. Hope to go home this week. Good to be here so I can see Carol twice a day.

I have written before about the sincere expression of LOVE I have felt in this facility, especially in the Alzheimer's Special Care Unit. It is the REAL THING. Now I have found the same sincere LOVE present in the Therepy Group. They work with some very handicapped individuals and are so sweet and loving. It is a real Blessing from God.

Carol is doing great and seems to be happy most of the tine. Smiles a lot and jabbers away. She does not seem to be hurting in any way and I can't ask for anything more.

Thank you for your prayers. bill and carol

NEW YEAR UPDATE

2012-01-16T09:13:00.000-08:00

First nice day of the new year and Eric,our son took Carol outside for a walk. Carol walks very good but most of us don't give her the chance. Eric always does and she really enjoys going outside.

She is happy most of the time and that is all we can ask for. She loves to receive attention and so many of the staff are cooperative.

Billl startedd off the new year recovering from back surgery. Stilll taking therapy and back seems to be getting better. I am resolved to live with artheritic pain in back, knees, shoulders, hands, etc. Getting old ain't for sissy's
Happy New Year to all visitors. We love you, bill

NURSING HOMES CAN BE GREAT!!!!!!!

2011-11-05T15:16:00.000-07:00

Nursing Homes do not have a universal reputation of being wonderful for the guests and their families. We are very fortunate to have found a NH just for Alzheimer's and actually called a Special Care Unit. It is a secure unit and most guests are given a reasonable degree of mobility, either by walking, wheel chairs or the Merry Walkers which is what Carol has. While in the Walker, she is able to sit, stand and actually walk whenever she wants to do so. Others can really manuever wheel chairs and go all over the Unit. Some residents are capable of walking without any assistance but it is not encouraged while it is also not restricted. The main concern is that a "walker" might be bumped by one of the guests in a wheel chair or Merry Walker.

But the main thing that makes this Special Care Unit so great is the four letter word----LOVE!!!!!! It is real and not just a facade. It goes both ways. The staff does love the guests and the guests really love the staff. Carol really gets gushey when some of the Aides or Nurses comes up and talks to her. She sees them out of the corner of her eye and actually wants them to come talk to her. She can not speak words but her smile and emotions say nothing but LOVE!!!!!She has her own language. We say that Carol's Christian Ministry is to spread God's Love around the halls of the Nursing Home. She has a big reputation and it even goes outside this particular Unit. The leading person in this sharing of real love, is the morning nurse, Janet Lowell. She is an amazing person and the guests all recogonize and love Janet. I feel sure the other staff folks also love Janet. Carol and I certainly do love Janet.

Others that work in or near Carol at the Christian Care Center are:

Ashley, Dusty, Regina,Cama, Marciel, Lucy, Brandi, Brittany, Rachel, Rosalynn, Joyce, Jesse, Debra, Tracie, Tawana, Marlene, Emma, Angela, Irene, and others that I have probably forgotten to include.

They also love me. bill

My Get Up and Go has Gone and Went!!!!

2011-10-04T15:40:00.000-07:00

Friends are always asking me “How are you doing?” I’m not sure how to answer that question. My physical health has a lot of aches and pains but my heart and blood pressure seem to be doing great. The Dr even took me off of my Blood Pres. medicine. My attitude is usually OK. I am thankful that Carol seems to be happy and contended. But I guess I do have periods of depression.
My get up and go has gone and went!!! I have always been a morning person but lately, I have trouble even getting out of bed. I think it is more than old age. I seem to be able to put off anything. I neglect my exercise program. Even eating is often skipped, which is certainly not normal for Bill Eldridge. I don’t cook much anymore. I have been on a low Carb diet and have lost 25 lbs. but have trouble with the discipline of a diet. My social life is also easily postponed and/or skipped. I watch a lot of news but miss being able to discuss (and cuss) the breaking news.
So, next time you ask me about how I am doing, you might not get a real meaningful answer.
I guess I'm coping well with the challenges in my life. But, having the love of my life in a nursing home does take it's toll. Bill

TALKING ALONG W/ HUGGING

2011-07-18T08:11:00.000-07:00

Carol has really started talking (jabbering) and singing more lately. Especially when she sees someone that gets her attention like staff ladies or Carman our daughter. Sometimes I get a little bit of recognition. I guess I am there so often that I am not worth a big greeting. There are certain staff members that she really gets excited over and that really makes those folks happy. This is more of Carol's ministry of showing God's Love to those in the Nursing Home. Her Ministry is so real to me and that makes me have such good vibes about Carol's situation. It could be so much worse.
Please keep Carol in your prayers.

Praise the Lord!!!!

THE SNOEZELEN ROOM

2011-03-25T18:01:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFQFyb_CNqk

This is a short news special on Channell 8 in Dallas, Tx. about Carol and the Snoezelen room at the Special Care Unit of the Christian Care Center in Mesquite, Tx. Hope you enjoy it. You won't often see Carol so relaxed. She is usually walking in her Merry Walker or standing up and down and up etc. Bill

NEW FRIENDS IN ALZ SPC. CARE UNIT

2011-03-05T07:49:00.000-08:00

Listed here are a number of the new friends we have met in this Special Care Unit in the Alzheimer's Wing. They are specially qualified to be in this Wing and security concerns is paramount. This is why Carol has her Merry Walker. Most of the residents are in Walkers or their own wheel chair.

Otillie is Carol's room-mate being helped by Velma (Black Velma) to put on hand lotion which they do every morning during the Activities time, which is great.

Traci is the head nurse of the Spc Care Unit. She has three sons in the military.

Paula has such a pretty smile. Likes to touch and hold hands with Carol.

Betty wears a glove on her right hand because she slaps the tray so hard whe might hurt herself.

Angela and Lucy are two of the fabulous Aides that work in this wing. It amazes me how much love and care these workers show to these Spc Care Residents.

Rita, w/ husband Walter, are really sweet. Rita loves to give out kisses, to almost anyone.

Elmer Preston is a resident but they let him do a lot of work like clean tables, floors and he even helps other residents with their meals, chairs, etc. He loves to help. Thiks he works there.

Chiya is a Jabanese lady and has been in this Special care unit longer than any one else. Allmost deaf.

Jack is one of our newest residents. His wife has AD also but is in a different wing and requires more attention. Jack often is looking for his "Red Cow"!

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Ashley and Janet, pm nurse and am nurse. Both really great and so full of love for the residents. We are blessed to have them.

Jessie has been here for 16 yrs and is really good with the residents. He is Carol's aide most of the time and can feed her better than any of us. Go Jessie!!!!

Irene is in charge of a fantastic program of Activities every day. Virginia is a resident that was given one of the Activity Aprons like Carol has.

CAROL LIKES TO CLAP HANDS

2011-03-05T07:40:00.000-08:00

The Altzheimer's Special Care Unit has almost continious activities between breakfast and lunch and more in the afternoon. Carol can not do the excercises or things like playing bingo but she has one very awsome ability. She claps at the right time during Bingo, or certain excercises.

It is very interesting to see some of the residents help each other. One lady, Velma, is especially helpful to other residents. Here she is helping Otillie, Carol's roomate, rub lotion into their hands.

SANTA CAME TO MY HOUSE!!!!!!

2010-12-29T07:21:00.000-08:00

Guess what????? When Igot up Christmas morning, I went into the living room and Lo and Behold, I discovered that Santa had come to see just me. I saw the plate and cup and thought Carman had come over and got some of our Christmas dishes. But then I looked closer, and saw crums and pieces of cookies on the plate. Strange!!!! And then a little Christmas tree caught my eye. It was in front of the fireplacem lit up and with gifts from Santa around the base of tree. And wouldn't you know, Santa had made footprints when he got down the chimney. I learned later that someone had actually seen 6 Young Elfs also at my house with wrapped gifts. Isn't that the sweetest thing for an Ol' Paps to rise and shine on Christmas morning with such a fantastic greeting.

Smoochin' time

2010-12-20T11:38:00.000-08:00

This is a vividly portrayed pic of Carol and I in a hot embrace while sitting on the new Love Seat which was delivered Fri. 12/17. I had suggested to management that we needed a Love Seat in the Alzheimer's Special Care Unit similer to what they had in the main Lobby and even had one in the visiting area of the Moore Unit. Low and behold, when I got there Fri afternoon they were placing not one but two in our Unit. They put this one in the Snoozling room and the other went to the TV room. Goal is to have them available for relatives and visitors to the Residents in the Alz Unit. Carol and I had to break it in. Before- Carol and I had to go all the way to Lobby or Moore Unit to find a Seat to sit in after walking all the way out to the front. While Carol is usually two busy walking, she does like to snuggle when we have a chance. I trained that girl right! Later that evenng, we spent about 45 min's in the Seat and Carol even took a little nap. My arm went to sleep but so what. It was worth the pain.

CAROL ELDRIDGE THE INTERIOR DECOATOR

2010-12-03T11:25:00.000-08:00

This picture of a Christmas tree at CCC in the main dining room took me back to some great memories of Carol back when she worked as an Interior Decorator all over North Texas. But, especially at Christmas she was always very busy. She was decorator for Presotnwood for about 5 years until they moved to their new location and we moved to Rockwall. Carol started off working with volunteers, our Sunday School class, on the immediate days after Thanksgiving. Finally the church realized the job was too big for volunteers and just hired Carol and her trained team of Christmas Decorators.

She also decorated about 10 buildings owned by Don Carter. Mostly the lobby of these buldings but wherever, Carol's first love was the trees themselfs. I wish she could really see these trees and remember the good ol days.

Proverbs 31:13 -----and works with eager hands. 14. ------

Thanksgiving Time

2010-11-22T08:51:00.000-08:00

It is that time of the year to pig out on turkey and such. But alsoa time to think about what we are actually thankful for. Carol is at the center of our thanks this year. Certainly, she is still in the final stage of Alzheimer's but God really seems to be using Carol as a Witness at the Alzheimer's Special Care Unit. I have tried to tell you a little in the last few posts about the love she seems to be handing out to those around her. She is so content and peaceful and really seems to like the life she is still living. Of course she does not remember any of the old Carol, the new Carol sure seems happy.

The Christain Care Center just had their annual fund raising banquet and invited Carman and I, as special guest. They had interviewed me several weeks before and included a few minutes in to their Festival of Trees 2010 DVD. I hope you can view it by clicking below.

Alzheimer's Spc Care Unit

2010-11-15T10:06:00.000-08:00

Carol's unit has been able to recover Irene, the Activity aide who had been relocated for several weeks. It is a real blessing to have Irene back. She has a special knack for making the residents happier and less stressful for the rest of the shift staff. Janet and others did a valient job entertaining the residents but where really to busy with answering phones, dispensing medicine, taking vital signs, etc. Irene really has a way with activities.

The staff is so important to the operation of the Unit and we (families, residents, and especially the staff themselfs) are really happy to be back again to such a fantastic unit.

Thanks to management for recognizing the need to return to old plan.

"ANOTHER BEATITUDE"

2010-11-02T09:27:00.000-07:00

These verses are printed and framed in a 12"x18" frame on the wall of the corridor that leads to Carols
Special Care Alzheimer's Unit at the Christian Care Center in Mesquite, Tx. I look at it often and thought it should be posted in Carol's Blog.

"BLESSED are they who understand
     my faltering step and shaking hand,

BLESSED, who know my ears today
     who strain to catch the things they say.

BLESSED are they who seem to know
     my eyes are dim and my mind is slow.

BLESSED are they who look away.
  I spilled my tea on the cloth that day!

BLESSED are they who, with cheery smile,
     stopped to chat for a little while.

BLESSED are they who know the way
     to bring back memories of yesterday.

BLESSED are they who never say,
     “You’ve told me that story twice today!”

BLESSED are they who make it known
that I’m loved, respected and not alone.

And BLESSED are they who will ease the days
of my journey home, in loving ways."

By Elisabeth Clark

CAROL IS (LIKE) AN ANGEL OF LOVE

2010-10-12T18:46:00.001-07:00

Mary Ann is one of Carol's favorite residents. Mary ann can stand and that makes it so much easier for Carol to give her a great big hug.

Carol seems to be taking on the role of an Angel of Love as she continues to Live with Alzheimer's. She loves to walk around the building in her "Merry Walker". She especially likes to meet and greet other friends, residents, staff, family and other visitors. She will often greet them with a sweet touch facial greeting. She loves to touch your arm, your blouse, name tag, etc. But if you are lucky, she will make a move towards you for a hug. She loves to hug and talk to you in her own way. I feel it might be the way an Angel might be to those in a Nursing Home. . All who have seen her lately agree that she epitomizes LOVE.

Carol and our son Eric. She does show affection to others.

Carol really showed a lot of affection to this lady who came with her husband for some musical entertainment. Carol really responded to her visitations during her songs. Oh what love hath no man!!!

If your want to be hugged like an Angel might give you a hug, I invite you to come by and visit Carol. She really enjoys visitors.

I am beginning to read up on Angels, especially as they relate to the emotion of Love. If you have a comment on this new subject, please add a comment below. Just follow the directions after indicating your request.

We love you and your interest and Love of Carol, Bill

Proverbs 31:13-31 ----works with her hands in delight. ----

howiscarol (and BILL) doing

2010-09-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

Carol is still very contented at the CCC at her Alzheimer's Special Care Unit. Physically things are good. She fractured her shoulder a moth ago but healing is going well. Memory is still going down but she does seem to enjoy her family and friends.

As far as me. It could be better and in fact, I am taking steps to improve my spirits. I was spending 4-12 hrs a day with Carol and I'm afraid it was too much for me. I would come home and eat and sleep. I had lost my :get up and go!" I had a long To Do list and not getting much done but the real necessities. So I have reduced my time with Carol to once a day for 2-4 hours, but they are the quality time for us around the evening meal. Weather is nice so we go outside often. She still seems to recognize some of her friends in the Moore Unit where she used to be.

My health is so-so with continued generative arthritis in back and knee still bother me a lot. Plan to have another pain shot next week to assist my Spinag cord Stimulator. Both shoulders continue a worsening of my rotator cuff limitations. Heart is doing good along with Reflux. Had another cornea transplant and it has healed well and a new prescription for glasses should finnish the treatment.

I am steadily getting my To Do list whittled away but am still pretty lazy. Glad Fall is here and hope to more outside now. Am trying to clean up papers and other junk that need filing or discarding. I can see a little of my desk today. But my bed is covered with stacks of paper that will be in boxes before I can go to bed tonight.

I am totally convinced that God has given us a new way to be the Witness He commanded us all to be. I will tell you more later about an opportunity I have to use this Blog and an interview to help the Christian Care Center at their annual Banquet. Getting back to Church Sunday School, some prayer groups and more time with Kids and GK's. Stay tuned for more exciting news from Carol's Blog

Love Bill

THERE'S A SWEET SWEET SPIRIT

2010-09-10T11:28:00.000-07:00

One song keeps coming up in my memory. This sweet hymn describes the staff and residents at the Christian Health Center so perfectly. The more you get to know both, it becomes clear that the Lord is present.:

There's a sweet sweet spirit in this place
And I know that it's the spirit of the Lord
There are sweet expressions on each face
And I know they feel the presence of the Lord

Sweet Holy Spirit
Sweet heavenly dove
Stay right here with us
Filling us with your love
And for these blessings
We lift our hearts in praise (hearts in praise)
Without a doubt we'll know that we have been revived
When we shall leave this place

Please click on the "POST A COMMENT" below and put in any code and you will then be able to leave a comment.
Love, bill and carol

ALZHEIMER'S IS A ___________ DISEASE!!!!

2010-09-05T18:54:00.000-07:00

Several weeks ago, I posted the above Title on the messge board for thealzheimerspouce.com and from many other caregivers, we came up with the following list of names that we often used to describe the nature of Alzheimer's:

Abomination, Abstinence maker, agony, apocalyptic, bankrupting, Consuming, cruel, degrading, demoralizing, denied, desolation, vile,DESPAIR, despicable, destructive, devastating, dreaded, Dream destroyer, earth-shattering , Empty, engulfing, Evil, Eviscerating, frustrating, gut-wrenching, hard, hateful, Heartbreaking, heart-wrenching, HELL, hit by a Mac truck, Horrible, hurt, Hurtful, ignored, Insidious, isolating, life-destroying , life-sucking, living death, Living hell, lonely , lunacy, meaningless, misunderstood, nerve-wracking, nightmare, overwhelming, painful, Paralyzing, Ruinous, Ruthless, S***ty, Sad, shattering, Solitary, sorrowful, “sucks”, terrifying , torment,Tragic, Unbearable, unfair, Unloved, unappreciated, useless, unbelievable, unfair, unrelenting, vile, worrisome,

Carman said that this list was troubling but it is just the truth, nothing but the truth about Alzheimer's. It helps us to realize that there are many of us taking care of our dear spouces. But, believe me, they are worth all the effort we have.

Feel free to send this note to others or even leave a comment below about your thoughts.

Love bill

Carol has a bad Friday 13th

2010-08-21T14:40:00.000-07:00

Carol has somehow fractured her upper arm joint and is now wearing a sling. Before breakfast we noticed she was winching when we tried to help her up using her left arm. During her morning bath, the aide noticed a bad bruise on her forearm. We have no idea how, where or exactly when she hurt the arm. But she did not want it moved or pulled. A portable xray machine was brought in and and they took eight good prints. First impression was a possible crack in shoulder and a lot of internal bleeding & swelling all down her arm.

Took her to an orthondist Tues and he confirmed the fracture and heavy bleeding. Injury could have happened getting in or out of bed, dressing, transfering to commode, etc. No one recalls anything specific that might have cause the problem. ( Staff probably thinks the old man could have caused it whele taking Carol for walks in her Merry Walker. I can not recollect any incidence out of the normal.s

But, surgery is not an option so she is wearing arm in a sling and seems to be doing OK. She uses her left hand a lot. Only indication of pain is when we adjust the sling.

Other than this setback, she has adjusted real good to this Special Unit and is joining in on the many activities that they have. From Breakfast to lunch, they excercise, play with ballons, a parachute to bounce the ballons around and lots of things that really interests the residents. She has her own recliner in the lounge/TV area and takes some day naps there.

The song that keeps talking to me about her new home is: "There is a Sweet, Sweet Spirit in this place". More about this description later.

We love to hear your comments which can be done by clicking the "Post Comment" below. Any password is OK. Thanks

CAROL HAS A NEW HOME

2010-07-24T15:09:00.000-07:00

Carol has just moved to another wing that is a Special Alzheimer's secure unit where she can move around by herself in a Merry Walker designed so that she can sit, stand up and walk on her own. It gives her so much more freedom.

In this wing, they also have a solarium called the SNOOZILEN ROOM. It has a number of psychadelic lights, moving bubbles, and wall items that allow her to touch, feel and listen to great old music.

This wing really allows the residents to participate in numerous activities, games and excercises. They also have a TV room which is also used for naps and rest and medicine ladies that handle all the different RX for the residences.

We will tell you more about her new home as we get used to it. Your comments are welcomed. Just click on the "comments" below and follow the instructions. A Google password is what ever you want to use.

Come see us sometimes. Bill

Carol's Special Friends Video

2010-07-23T19:22:00.000-07:00

We will try to keep this video updated with the latest residents and workers with Carol at Christian Care Center in Mesquite. We rejoice in the lives of these wonderful residents and workers.
(Click the > arrow on pic below)

Carol Has New Friends!!

2010-05-06T14:37:00.000-07:00

We've just completed our first 3 months at the Nursing Home at the Christian Care Center. And as so usual in her life, Carol Has New Friends. She sometimes talks to them and many seem to understand a word or two better than I do. She likes to touch arms, blouses, hands or most anything that she thinks interesting. Especially jewelry and name tags. She probably smiles at her new friends more than she does me. I am just a given but the staff, residents, and other family visitors seem to get her attention. She does not see any old friends but does not know it. She is very "contented" and I am so thankful that God has given her this Grace. A little list of some of her my new friends are:

Nurses: MaryPatty Dooley*,(morning); Michelle Bunch* (weekends), Mary Thomas* (Unit nurse)- (Unit Mgr), Judy(had baby), Heather*, Debra, Sandy Kim, Vonceia* (evenings other wing), Tracy Royster (Unit Mgr-Spc. Alz) ; Asheley Green (Alz AM.)
Aides (CNA's): Patricia*, Katina, Mary, Henrietta*, Cinda; Maria; Domianna, Claudia (16 yr Ministry), Mary* (Hospice), Sonia, Abraham (11-7); Veronique; Caroline (looks like Wendy's ad)etc
Medicine Ladies: Sheila*, Stella* (with beutiful daughter), Suzy*, Glenda *with cute daughter), Abraham;
Therapist:; Angela*, TK, Terry; Victoria,; Monita Chamless; (therapy @ Conferance)) plus others
Volunteers: Shirley*, Mary,Virginia* and John Cathey (Ribbon Lady & Husband-Elder); Kay Arthur; plus others
Residents: Lillie, Maxine (back to courtyard), Bernice Ellifret*(Carol roomate), Ruth Odom,
Lois Monk*(husband Chris*-had quad bipass surgery), Royce; Bill Cannon (feeds the squirells); Wilhameena Sponber*, Bert (Alberta), Mary Ann Swindell* (helps everybody); Matt Nickerson*(uses back scratcher to operate his elec chair; wife Gayle), Marcella* and Jack Smith, Ruby Francis*; (brrrrr), Ms Lucile Galloway*, Lillie Mcknight*(99 yrs, brthdy:Aug 12); Lillian*(looks kinda like Lillie), Betty Leake* (pretty hands); Thomas Little*(went to VA);. Virginia Walker (regal gray hair), Ann, Blanche Underwood*, Olga Webber(deaf but reads lips); Frieda Field* (glasses and pretty ear rings); Ann Bently (and son John, song leader at Church)*; Carrie and Andy Carrick*(daughter=Karen); Martie Reicer; Anita Wiener*, (with brace for back); wore back brace; Charles Knight*; Betty Bethune*; Faye Hill (reads her Bible); Betty Leake*; Mary Ann Swindell* (sweet to residents & me); Charles Knight*; Martie Reicer* (short gray hair w/ glasses); Wynell Callana*; Bettie Bethune*:Ron(ald) Watkins* (sister Lavelle); plus others
Maintenance: Rob(3777), John, Dale*, Paul,
Administration: : Stephanie Paul*, Kathleen, Mr Mitchel, Kristina (Fam Mtng); Kyn dell (Social Worker); Judy ____*;
Beauty Shop: Dina
food service Mary Harris, (supervisor): Lisa (Dietician);
Housekeeping: Lottie Murphy* (very friendly), Phyliss; Layerman (Porter from Liberia); Elta; Francesca Martinez* (real sweet to residents);
CC; Danny Mac (Chaplin); Ray Hunter*, Minister; John Bently*; Sandra Admanta, (Family Conferance) Sandre Amanta (Family Conf.); Mary Harris, (food service); Monita Chamlea (therapy) ETC
Activities: Sally Lewis (Organ lady), Shirley (neighbor)
Restorative: Carla; Vanessa; Angella Henderson;

* Also in video above!

Sure there are a few who are not always smiling but most of those above smile when addressed (by first name if possible) and some talk so sweetly to Carol----Honey, Momma, Ms Carol, Sweetheart, etc. She definitely sees more friends at the Care Center than she saw at home. She likes to walk (with assistance) go outside, look at newspaper ads, watch TV, dining (but needs help), I hope bathing, hair stuff, etc that is done with the staff is equally pleasant but I don't participate in those areas. CCC is a good place and God is dedfinitely in control of Carol and her well being. I feel confident that this is the new ministry that God has led us to serve Him. It is such a great honor and true Joy. Love, Bill

GOD IS GOOD

2010-04-16T19:17:00.000-07:00

The other evening about 5pm they had Carol sitting out in the hall by the Nurses station and she decided to go for a walk. Has been walking good for me and the Theripist but had not gotton up on her own and just took off--about 6-8 feet to see her roommate. But the mechanisms for lock ON the wheels and foot rests of Bernices chair got tangled up with her feet and she slid down the face of chair and she cut her upper lip and skinned her arm and knee. But she bled so much as we all do with a head injury that they called the ambulance and we met her at the ER. Every thing checked out ok and they glued the wound shut, took some mri and Eric and I gtook her back to her room. She was in good spirits the whole time. God Is Good. He decided to make up for the fall and little injuries and proceeded to straighten her neck up to about 15 degrees from verticle. Best her neck been this good in a couple of months. She is also much more alert and actually seems to be happier. Last two days have been good. I try to feed her at meals because she has lost 20 lbs in last 2 months. I don't know if she eats any better for me but it is good therapy for me also. Even her physical excercises and walking by the Therapist is good therapy for me. I am encouraging the Aids and Nurses to let Carol walk when they can. At least around her room. God is improving my spirits while He is helping Carol physically.

Head Nurse was amazed that Carol's face was not black and blue because of the way she looked right after the accident. Not a bruise on her face or even body for 2 days and then some on cheek and jaw. She is a hardy soul.

GOD IS GOOD!!!!!!!!

NURSING HOME TIDBITS

2010-03-31T18:00:00.000-07:00

I have read a number of comments on other Blogs about Nursing Homes and how they sometimes upset you or make you disappointed with them. Carol has been in a NH since early January and I now have 3 months experience. I was very confused about the NH at first but herer are some little tidbits that have helped me:

• 1. The concentration of wheelchairs around the nurses station is good for the patients. Otherwise they would be in their rooms without seeing any activity except a quick passerby.
• Most nurses or aides do have good hearts and are doing something that very few of us would be willing to pursue.
• I encourage the aides and staff to smile more often. They have beautiful smiles and it would be good for the visitors as well as the patients.
• Talk to the other patients, even if they can’t carry on a conversation. They like the attention. I am astounded about how many do not seem to have any regular visitors.
• Take your LO for a walk, maybe outside to a courtyard or just around the building. The change of scenery is helpful.
• Take Sunday Ad sections from the newspaper and help them leaf through them looking at the children, the pretty shoes, or sporting goods for the men.
• Remember all the little things they get like baths, shampoo, skin lotion, potty help, good food, eating help, medicine help (crushed pills),etc.
• Respond to those other patients that seem to want to talk or just ask you a question.
• Get personal with the staff. They have homes, families, kids, pets, etc.

Add to this list from what you have experienced. Certainly, a NH is not the most desirable place for our LO but it is a big help for the Caregivers. Just click on the ADD COMMENTS below and sign in. This is a very secure site and Ok to use your email.

CAROL IS DYING (Slowly but surly!)

2010-03-04T11:24:00.000-08:00

I don’t mean to be blunt or shocking but that is a true statement. Carol’s Alzheimer’s (AD) in now in the later stages and we see part of her loosing out to AD almost daily. And though I know that Carol would not want to prolong this despicable disease, her physical body continues to fight on. Cognitively, Carol is almost gone but she still likes to look at her picture albums and newspaper ads. Sometimes she does seem to recognize family but most of the time, there is no acknowledgement that she knows us. Physically, her walking has greatly degraded but we still work with her on a walker. However, the Nursing Home got her a wheelchair and always use that instead of the walker. The therapist works with her on MWF on walking and other leg exercises. We hope that will improve her quality of life. The Therapy seems to also be helping her cognitive abilities. She is still continent and can swallow and drink but needs to be fed each bite. Does use a straw most of the time. I think her vision is also failing but she loves to look at her picture books.
According to the Alz Assoc. they estimate that Carol could live for several years or only several months. But it is inevitable. AD is a terminal illness with only a few research projects offering any hope for even diagnosing the disease early enough to maybe stop it or at least really slow it down. The medications she takes now do not do much good in the latter stages. But as I said in a previous blog, 2/17/10, God is Great and He definitely answers prayers. He has given Carol a peace and contentment that is making it much easier on her, and of course the family. She is in no pain, has no anger, or sadness.

Psalm 23.

.

For more information on this gradual death of the brain, I refer you to my Aug 23, 2009 Post:

“What’s it like from Carol’s side of her Brain”

GOD ANSWERS PRAYER!!!!!

2010-02-17T17:21:00.000-08:00

Carol has now been in the Nursing Home (NH) for 3 weeks and we are very comfortable by the way that God has answered our prayers. We prayed that she would not have any sadness, anger, or desires to leave whenever we visited. Only God could have enabled these request to come about.

Carol is very Content, glad to see us ( very simply) and likes to see her family visit her. She has never asked me to take her home, --please don't go--etc, She is very peaceful with her surroundings. The staff seems to be taking good care of her. One aide has changed Carol's hair to a pony tail to keep it out of her face. Her head is nearly always drooping to the right. It was hard to feed her and she seemed to even have trouble chewing so they now chop her main food up. But she does swallow her food, drinks her tea or water. She continues to walk from her recliner to her bed, to her bathroom. But the staff is very cautious and protective which is OK with us. A fall can be a disaster in her lifestyle.

GOD IS GOOD and we are very relieved to have her reacting in such a good way.

But----please do keep us in your prayers. I am feeling a lot of loneleness but OK otherwise.

Love from Carol and Bill. 2/17 7:00PM

CAROL IS NOW IN A NURSING HOME

2010-02-01T12:34:00.000-08:00

Last friday, the Alzheimer's facility decided that Carol could get better and more personal care in an adjoining Nursing Home. So we moved her and took some of her furniture but she is sharing a room. But she seems contended and we see no anger or agitation. She sometimes shows recognition but usually she just continues to look at pictures or eat or whatever she was doing. No conversation but seems to be in fairly good spirits. We still feel that this is what God was leading us to do. It is very hard on me as I just get down and funky. I'm OK when I am with her but miss her in our home.

Leave a comment if you feel like it. bill

CAROL NOW LIVING IN AN ALZHEIMER'S FACILITY

2010-01-16T08:46:00.000-08:00

During December, Carol took a downward spiral and had a fall and several squats that took her down. I had great difficulty getting her back to her feet. She was still walking hesitantly and we tried to indoctrinate her to use a walker. She was still sleeping well and eating with some "proding". I awoke one morning with the strong conviction that the time had arrived to start the process of finding a new home for Carol. I truly believe that God was directing this new direction. We choose The Courtyard, part of The Christian Care Center, Mesquite. It is the same facility her father lived for about a year. We think it is very good with a lot of compassionat staff.

Carol seems to be adjusting very well and has not had any anger or sad actions. She is glad to see us when we get there and is being kept busy with a lot of interestng activities.

I will post more in several days. bill

50th Wedding Anniversary

2010-01-05T07:28:00.000-08:00

50th Wedding Anniversary

Bill & Carol Eldridge

Bill & Carol Eldridge are celebrating their 50th Wedding Anniversary on January 15, 2010. Due to Carol’s condition with Alzheimer’s we are compiling a Memory Book for them in lieu of a reception. You are someone important in their lives! Please help us celebrate with them by emailing or mailing a fond memory you have with Bill & Carol. Carol LOVES pictures so photographs of you, or with Bill & Carol will be most appreciated. Please mail or email your stories by January 15th to one of the addresses below.

cdennard@att.net (Carman Eldridge Dennard) or eric@theeldridges.net (Eric Eldridge) or

billeldridge2@att.net (Bill Eldridge)

Or, snailmail to: Bill Eldridge
3404 Waterview Trail

Rockwall, TX 75087

Here's a a short video commemorating our 50 years of marriage:

THANKSGIVING UPDATE-2009

2009-11-21T14:34:00.000-08:00

I will try to decipher some things that Carol might be Thankful at this time in her rapidly declining life. Some ideas that come to mind, in no particular order:

She still sleeps good at night and sometimes an afternoon nap with me. We go to bed soon after it gets dark but I try to keep her awake until at least 8:00 pm. She awakes soon after daybreak. Sleeps very solidly.
She is still is able to go to bathroom by herself but I usually remind her. She seems to have a larege bladder which is something I am very thankful for. A few minor accidents but not using Depends yet.
She is still able to walk though it is more like a shuffle. A couple of trips but onlly one fall and this is another big thing - Thank you Lord!
She still likes to eat and does OK in this dept. I have to prepare food and serve her and then cut up her food. Does not drink much unless I coax her. Try to keep a Coke out all day so that she will get some liquid. Water is sometimes OK at mealtime. Also Crystal Light Peach Tea.
Her sensory ability is noticibly declining. Especially her smell and taste. She now eats some things she hasn't eaten since we have been married. Things like onions, brown bread, cottage cheese, sour cream, and even ate some of my corn beef hash the other morning. Her smelling ability has almost vanashed which makes my male bad habits go unnoticed. I am not sure she hears as good but definitely does not understand most words. Her speech is virtually gone except for a very few words or phrases. Still says " I love you" and Thank you. Go is a major expression because she love to go places. I call her my Go Go Girl.
Not only does she profess to love me, she follows me around the house all the time. Does not like to be left alone. In the kitchen, she is right behind or beside me whatever I am doing. But she can not really help anymore. Still try to get her to help me put away the dishes from the dishwasher but it is not very successful.
Her favorite pastime is looking at pictures, or albums or picture magazines. She acts like she is explaining what she is looking at but we seldom know what she is saying. They call it babbling and it is so sad, because I know she wants to talk to me but most of the times she accepts that I don't know what she is saying. I think it hurts me more than it does her.
I am thankful that Carol does not seem to realize how much she has lost. It would be devastating to her and unbearable to live. Sometimes, she cries and she can't tell me what is wrong. I assume that she is experiencing some kind of realization that something is wrong. She used to ask questions about her disease and if she would ever get well. Now, I hear nothing but just witness the blank look on her face. It is very hard to see her dieing a little more each day. I think a big day of Thanksgiving will be when she gets to join Jesus in Heaven.
We are especially thankfur for all our friends from the neighborhood and church who have been so kind by bringing prepared meals. They have been excellant and much better than my cooking. Many have also come by to visit and stay with Carol while I take a little break or respite. You're great friends.
We are both thankful to have a baby in the house 3 days a week when Addy comes to help us. Carol does seem to enjon Caleb or as I call him-"bigaboy!"

Hope I was not too descriptive. I will try to add some things as time goes on. Love to you all!!!!! Bill

Some have asked if we could use your Help!!

2009-09-19T13:30:00.000-07:00

I'm often asked by many of you, our friends, what you can do to help(?). It's hard for me to answer that some of the time. I've been encouraged to make a little list, (below). If you find it in your heart to choose from this list, or if it gives you another idea, we'll love and appreciate you even more! I have a Helper (from Ghana) that comes over three days a week for a few hours. She cooks lunch and does the laundry and other light housekeeping. But mostly, she entertains Carol by looking at pictures, or playing with her 3 month old baby boy that Carol loves. But Carol does not like it when I leave for any reason (except maybe a Doctors visit) and is angry when I get back. Almost not worth it. But Carol does like to:

Go to movies
Drive around the county
Drive through residential neighborhoods.
And of course go to Church.
She likes to eat out and her manners are not embarrassing, just a little slow
She likes people to come by and visit (but conversation is almost impossible)
She likes to look at any kind of picture. Mildred brought her pic’s of her mission trip to Ghana
I could use any kind of meal, (casserole, salad, sandwich, etc.) for evenings.
I also need conversation with other adults but that is hard because Carol wants to be included.

If you would like to help and any of these items appeal to you, I am sure open. Alzheimer’s is very hard on the Caregiver. The constant attention it requires is never ending. And it is so sad to see the one you love loose her brain right in front of you. Ronald Reagans daughter wrote the book “THE LONG GOODBYE!” which is very appropriate. We still have hope but it is not because of any cure that is even on the horizon. We hope they find it sooner rather than later.

Thank you, Carol and Bill

MIRACLE MEMORY

2009-09-02T14:55:00.000-07:00

Today, I took Carol to the movie about Julia Childs. As we were walking from handicap parking, around the bldg to the theater entrance, Carol pulled an old memory out of her brain. When we were still about 20 yards to the few stairs, Carol reminded me that " right up in front is where you fell before" (or something like that!) The fall did happen but it was 2 yrs ago last Jan. There is nothing even close to this old memory that she remembers. When we got to the stairs, I pointed to the placed I fell and she seemed to agree. It was a very dramatic occasion. I was bleeding badly and had sore knee and arm. Someone called 911 and we were transported to the emergency room. Presbyterian Hosp, Rockwall, sent me and ambulance to Presby. Dallas because their MRI machine was out of order. Presby decided that main damage was a broken nose, but no concussion or skull damage. Guess that shows what a hard head I am. I thought I had damage to my right eye but Dr finally decided that it was Macular Degeneration. Thought you would get a better understanding of what Carol might have remembered. She does recogonize pictures of family members, especially her mother, father and of course her siblings and her children.

If you want to leave a comment, just click on the comment below and look at bottom of screen for an open box. Would love to hear from you. bill

What's it like from Carol's side of the brain?

2009-08-22T18:13:00.000-07:00

It is so hard for us to understand what is going on in our Loved Ones (LO) brain. The brain is loaded with thousands of cells, jangles, protons, neurons, etc. All very complicated for most of us. But the end result is a lot of dead and dying cells. These cells do a lot of things like causing us to breath, smell, see, talk, eat, and most important to this discussion-----to think and remember. Carol has lost most of her long term as well as short term memory. She does not know what day it is. What your name is. Where we live. How many kids and grandkids we have. but she does recogonize a friendly face that somehow turns her happy and even talkative. But the words are very hard to make any sense. Sometimes we do recognize a word or two but a sentance is almost impossible to recogonize. But it is so hard to visualize what Carol is seeing or thinking. It has to be hard for her brain to not recogonize what is going on. What are people saying, What she needs to do, say or what!

Taking a bath is something that seems to go early. She really looses her composure in the morning at bath time. I think it has something to do with her pride. She has always taken her baths without any assistance but now she finds me drawing the bath, putting in the bubble bath and urging her to get in the tub. It really makes her mad. From her side, the part of her brain that gives her independance and she thinks I am taking it away. I am the bad guy. Sometimes I am the "Devil". Then when she is in the tub, it even gets harder. The use of soap and the reason for it have been lost. I try to give her help and instructions but again, that is her territory and I am intruding.

At meal times, I might ask Carol to hand me a knapkin but pointing at the holder. She sees the direction but has no idea what it is I am asking for. She might touch a fork, a saltl shaker, etc. Naturally it is frustrating for me, but think what it must be from her side. She wants to help and do something when asked but does not know what. And the sad part, she sometimes realizes that she does not understand what I am asking. All she might see is a table full of stuff that she can not name. I ask her to get the milk out of fridge and she tries to open the right door but has no idea what I am asking for. from her side, it is just more confusion.

She loves to look at picture albums and does recoganize people like her dad, mother, brother and sister and knows who they are. Not their names but at least the family relationship. She recoginizes the grandkids but not who they belong to. She does recogonize Carman and Eric but not when I am trying to tell her where we are going and whose house it is.

Carol's Brain has lost so many cognitive cells in her brain that she really can't carry on conversations, does not know the name of anything, can not put things away where they belong, or even know that we still love her. Her brain turns to anger when it gets confused and that is usually at her caregiver, which is usually me. These bad things are not her fault and I have to constantly remind myself that those things from the past are gone, apparently for ever. Yes, she dies a little everyday and that is very sad.

If you want to leave a comment, just go below here and click on comment. It might ask you for your log in but don't worry, there is no danger from this website.

Kitty is now KittyBoy

2009-08-22T17:58:00.000-07:00

I took Kitty in to be neutered as required by the animal shelter. Came back the next day and the Vet had a surprise for me. Miss Kitty was a boy. so now we call herXXXX KittyBoy. He does not like the pink collar I bougth for his predecessor. But the reason for getting the kitty cat in the beginning has not changed. He is still a pleasure to have around the house. Carol lets him sleep in her lap or beside her quite often. He is g etting so big but still a kitten. After getting him declawed, she does not get scratclhe as much but still does not like the sharp teeth. does like the playfulness and just running around. Kitty and Bubba are getting along OK but the old cat still gets irritated by the youngster.

OUR LAST VACATION WITH Mimi

2009-08-10T15:32:00.000-07:00

The following is an e-mail sent by the best daughter-in-law, Wendy, to my daughter Carman. I thought Carol's friends might like to see it.

"The picture of your dad holding your mom while she floated and sang in the waves clung to me as I think back about our vacation.

It struck me how much trouble your dad went through – first to get her into her bathing suit ,which was an ordeal in itself, then enduring the walk while she pinched him and complained, then the anger and more complaining as he got her past the waves and surf into calmer waters. She had so little understanding of what was going on around her and the joy that awaited her while he guided her gently and patiently to the sand bank.

This was such a good lesson for me and our kids of your dad’s love for your mother; but also of our Father’s love for us. How many times we complain and grumble when we do not like our circumstances and wonder where He is leading us. If we would only trust Him and know that He loves us and wants only good things for us. Then the uncomfortable circumstances -- the nuisance of water splashing on our face – will be so insignificant compared to the joy of being held in Him arms and being in His embrace.

Would it not be simpler if we did not fight Him, complaining all the way, but follow or be led and enjoy walking alongside the our bridegroom."----Wendy Eldridge

If you want to add a comment, just click the word "comment" below and a window will come up. We would like to hear from you, bill

BEACH VACATION

2009-08-10T14:28:00.000-07:00

Our kids and I agreed to take a go at one more beach vacation this year. We selected a condo on Mustang Island, near Corpus Christi and rented a 3 BR Condo that slept 11 on beds and couches. It was cozy but real good bonding for all of us. One day we had a niece and her daughter and friend came to visit but stayed nearby in a motel. Carol certainly had some times of total confusing but most of the time she seemed very happy. She did like our walk out into the surf, 3rd bar where it was chest deep, or deeper at times. It was difficult to get her out there by me and daughter, Carman the first time. Our hands got squeezed strongly but then the first wave seemed to thrill her and she totally relaxed. So much so that her legs usually floated up and she was content to let us hold her up under arms. Stayed out a long time first and second days and would not trade that experience for anything. See the Post by our daughter in law, Wendy Eldridge, mother of 4 of our grandkids.

The 8 ½ hour drive down was very tiring but I did have my grandson, Alex, help with the driving, even though he still drives like a teenager. On the way back, I did all the driving and was very tired when we got back. But no problem in the car. A lot of signs got pointed out and described in her own unique language. Also had an hour or more of fun folding and unfolding a highway map. Had a few little naps going down but some much longer naps coming back. I had messed up her medications and gave her the evening meds, with her seroquel, in the morning before we left. She had some long naps with head bent over so far, I was afraid she would hurt her neck.

My daughter was an angel and helped me so much taking care of Carol. She helped with her shower and shampoo after each beach visit plus took her on some shopping trips. Son Eric also helped a lot, especially at the beach when I took some naps. Carman even shared her swim suit, and shorts with her mother. My blood pressure was high and I took more than normal. Have already sent a fax to my cardiac Dr about changing my dosage. I kept records of my high pressure. Eric’s and Carman’s kids were real sweet to MiMi, my DW, and she enjoyed all the attention. I know she will enjoy looking at all the pictures the kids took.

We call this our last vacation with MiMi but she has progressed more slowly at other times so another trip is possible but not very likely. Take your good, family trips while you can. The memories will surely last several lifetimes.

If you want to add your comment and/or memories, just click on the word "content" below and share with us. bill

"Kitty" seems to be best medicine yet!!!!!

2009-06-19T18:34:00.000-07:00

Asked our Grand Daughter to help find a kitten that might keep Carol company, entertained, and happy. We checked the local animal shelter and found about 20 kittens up for adoption. Narrowed it down to 3 and asked Raena, GD, to pick one she thought would be best choice. She picked a female with white chest, and leg boots under blalck body with brown, black, and white mixed on face. Carol finally got used to Kitty and they are now enjoying each other. Claws a little sharp for Carol's thin skinned legs so need to learn how to clip her nails or might have to have her de-clawed. Carol just raves about how cute and sweet she is.

Gave up on finding a name that Carol understood and just stayed with "Kitty" ------the KISS principle!!!!!.

I asked some of the other spouces on thealzheimerspouce.com "message" board about maybe getting a small puppy and had a lot of recommendations but the paper training task scared me off. We have a big black cat and all the litter boxes, etc. but most of all it felt easiest for me. The miniature dogs would probably have been as good, if not better but the house training of a young puppy just seemed more that I could handle. "If it ain't a problem, don't make it one".

Our big black male cat is not sure about Kitty at all. Not afraid but maybe jealous. He has swatted at Kitty several times. But I have hopes they get to be friends or at least put up with each other.

Click “comments” below if you want to send us a comment. Thanks, bill

I'M BACK TO 24/7

2009-06-17T09:54:00.000-07:00

Our very sweet Helper, Addy, just had a baby boy this morning. 8 lbs. We are giving her a baby shower Sunday afternoon. I will miss her cause she gave me about 18 hrs of respite each week. I did not always go anywhere but it did allow me to do some chores and even tried to take a little nap while Addy was here. I would have Addy take Carol to a movie, once a week. Carman will try to fill in some since she is out of school for the summer, but still very busy with her kids and so many summer activities.

Some of you have asked in the past if you could help. Well, I do think I would accept your offers now. Carol likes to go to movies, drive around and look at new residential areas or just the cows and horses. She will usually get mad at me after a little while for not being with her. I am her security blanket but she often gets very angry at me. She still eats out fairly well, especially hamburgers, fries, cole slaw. Likes fried fish, shrimp, chicken planks, pot roast and fried okra. She eats more things than that but those are handled at cafes easier.

But we both like to have visitors and sit around and have some adult conversation. We won’t understand Carol all the time but we just say, OK, sure, that’s nice, I don’t know, or almost anything in reply.

You can email us at billeldridge2@att.net or make a comment on this blog but simply clicking on the word “comments” just below this Post. Always love to read your replies.

So there you go. This is my life these days. Addy brought me some relief and some fun time with Carol. I love visiting with you any time, and breaks are always GREAT.

Love from Carol and Bill

How is Bill doing???

2009-06-01T07:14:00.000-07:00

Some of you have asked about me so I thought I would tell a little about my health. My latest problem is my heart. Going to Heart Dr. today to discuss a siege of low blood pressure and low heart rate late last week. My family Dr suggested I go see my Heart Dr today and I have a 11:20 appointment. Friday and Sat my blood pressure bounced around 90/40and 100/50 but heart rate was down to 33, 37, 40 with some really bothersome light headiness some dizziness and weakness. They have stopped my Atenolol and a pacemaker has been mentioned.

Heart Dr said that it looks like my Atrial Fibralation had come back. I had trouble with my Heart Rate 4 years ago but medicine has kept it regular since then. Dr wants to tinker with my medication and see if I am not in need of a Pacemaker. But I will have to take Coumadin for now and that makes my larms and legs real bruised and so easy to bleed.

This is my Robert Duvall look alike!!!!!
Otherwise back to other health problems, my severely degenerated (arthritis) joints, knees, lumbars, and terrible rotator cuffs. My hip replacement has been great. Right eye still has Macular Degeneration but shots and drops have made it much better. Same eye is also always dry and requires tear drops often. Use a cane or maybe my walker to hopefully prevent any more falls. My balance is certainly not what I would like. Hearing continues to be a problem, especially in hearing Carol who naturally speaks too softly for me. Too overweight but I am working on that. (Not easy for me, I love to eat----a major sin in my life) Triglcyrides are too high and taking Rx Lovasa. Part of my triglcyrides probably conneceted to my Reflux problem which I have had for years. Have to sleep on a wedge. Dr said I seem to have pre-diabetis. Otherwise I am a walking, breathing, listening CAREGIVER!!!!!

to leave your own comment, just click on "comments" below.

Come see us. We love visitors!!!! Bill

REPORT #2 ON CAROL

2009-05-16T09:39:00.000-07:00

AD is still in control. I just try to find as much happiness for Carol all during the day. Her Anger spells have improved quite a bit and when she does have one, it seems to be her pride and self esteem that are hurting. She wakes up most mornings and crys. She can’t tell me but I can tell she is talking about her inability to do things. It is so sad. I hurry and get up and get us dressed. I have to help her with her bath, her make-up, help select her clothes, etc. She does try to make up the bed and it looks OK when she is done. She can brush her hair, put on her mascara after I hand it to her. She can put on her foundation, etc if I guide her a little. She really does not know that she looks better with her make up. This is just recent. Picture above is Carman giving her mother, Carol, a shampoo.

Breakfast is next and she can feed herself but I have to get out the cereal, bowl, spoon and milk. Only thing she still tries to do in the kitchen is wipe the tables and counters, also the floor with a napkin. I try to let her put away the dishes and glasses from the dish washer but it we have to really guide her as to where things go. She eats well but a little slow because she gets sidetracked with looking at anything with pictures. At restaurants, she really enjoys the presence of children and waves to them, makes faces, and often stops on the way out to talk to them. I have a card that I sometimes give to waitress and parents of the children. It says “Thank you for being patient with my Wife. She has Alzheimer’s”. I don’t want people to thing she is senile. But it is surprising to me how people do not seem to understand. On the other hand, many will say that a relative or friend of theirs has Alzheimer’s.

Carol still loves movies, especially Cinemark and even at home on TV. She laughs at the right time and seems to be able to follow some of the movie. But she can loose interest real quick. Addy took her to Cinemark yesterday and Carol griped from the start of the movie with Jamie Fox, so Addy took her down the hall to another movie and Carol was perfectly happy. Carol still likes to talk but most of the time it is very hard to figure out what she is saying. Sometimes I can figure it out by hand movements, or just one key word because she does tell the same stories over and over.

Physically, she is in pretty good shape. We have been working on a UTI lately but I was glad to hear it was that instead of incontinence. She sleeps well at night and often naps during the day while she is watching TV. She shuffles more now but no indication of imbalance or falling. Sees and hears very good but her ability to smell and taste have really declined. Carol still enjoys talking to our friends, even though she may not remember your name or from where she knew you . Thank you for your consideration and understanding.

If you want to add your own comment, just click on the word "comments" below.

bill

CAROL'S PERSONAL TESTIMONY, 2000

2009-05-10T12:22:00.000-07:00

I found this Word Document on Carol's computer just a few years ago. I had never heard her talk about this great day in her life with this much detail. I thought you might like to read it.

"I was raised in a wonderful Christian home. My Father was a young Deacon and Mother worked in the nursery. The first time Jesus spoke to me about giving myself to him was in 1943. I was seven years old. The Lord spoke to me in church one Sunday in March and I instantly understood what our pastor had been preaching about – when he said we needed to give our live to Jesus.

This was in the middle of World War II and we were flooded with radio news about the war. Every evening after supper we would gather around the radio to hear war reports. We were to knit sweaters, grow food in our back yards, ration sugar and could not buy tires for our car. The whole country sacrificed for the war. Every Sunday I would ask my grandmother to move us closer to the front of the church. Closer to Jesus. Finally, one night, I could not go to sleep. I tiptoed into Daddy’s bed for a talk. I asked him, “Daddy – is it alright to love Jesus more than the war?” He explained that Jesus is the most important person in the world. More than war, cars and gasoline. We talked about giving my life to Him. The next Sunday I went to the front of the church and told the pastor that I had given my life to Jesus and wanted to be baptized. I was baptized on the afternoon of Easter Sunday. The pastor gave me a lily from the flower arrangement in front of the pulpit.
I don’t remember anything else about being seven years old. Only the fact that I had given my life to Jesus and I will someday live in Heaven with Him. My seven year old grandson Alex was baptized this week. And I know, with out a doubt, that someday, he will be in Heaven with me"

I am so glad I found this before she lost her ability to type.

THE LONG GOODBYE

2009-05-07T17:32:00.000-07:00

Alzheimer’s Disease is often called THE LONG GOODBYE and that is such an appropriate name. I have called it the slow death also. Carol has had beginning symptoms of AD since 1996 but real debilitating and visible actions of her daily life since about 2003-4. She first started with just short term memory but long term memories also came along and that was probably began THE LONG GOODBYE. But I could not carry on a conversation with her on our beautiful past activities. Names of people, places, things, etc. were a daily occurrence. This was when I first began to really feel that we were loosing part of her living person. I no longer had the girl I had married. A new girl was beginning to take shape. I inherited a great love for this new person but there is no doubt that it is a new person. Or at least a new personality.

A book has been written by this same name, “THE LONG GOODBYE”, written by Patti Davis about losing her father, Ronald Reagan to AD. I have not read it but will try to do so. So many illnesses take away only physical things but do not really affect the personality of the patient. AD strips the patient of their cognitive abilities as well as all the personal attributes. They also loose smell, taste, and later even hearing, and eating.

Some of the other caregivers I communicate with talk about being a “married widow”. Carol and I no longer talk about husband/wife things like the children, grandchildren, vacations, movies, entertainment, etc. We are no longer a typical husband and wife. I will never leave her and I have trouble hoping for a cure. I do hope for some kind of breakthrough that could return some of the brain functions that have been severely damaged. She takes medications to slow the disease down and I sometimes wonder if she would really have wanted to drag out what is now considered inevitable. But I continue to dance with the girl what brung me to the dance.

Home Care HELPER for Carol

2009-05-03T17:54:00.000-07:00

We have had several ladies who specialize in Sr Home Care. They have all been from Ghana and have been a real help for Carol and me. They do some light house keeping and cooking for about 3 days per week. Adde is our current Helper and Carol really likes her. They look at a lot of picture books and journals. Photos of any kind are Carol’s favorite pastime and Addy has the patience to look at them with Carol. Adde’s mother in Ghanna loves to grow vegetables and we have planted a little garden here at our small yard, hoping that Carol will renew her enthusiasm with gardening. Things are just now starting to grow so we will see. Addy has a husband and 2 girls, 3 & 5 who come out to our house occasionally. Carol loves the girls and they play well together. Addy is expecting a baby boy in latle June or July and Carol gets excited when she notices the babies growth. Stay tuned for future GARDEN REPORTS.

Are Caregivers Blessed?????--I think so!!!!

2009-04-27T11:29:00.000-07:00

I have been communicating (via the internet or support groups) with a lot of other Caregivers for a number of years and I see and feel so much pain and anguish in their lives. Many of them seem to blame God for the slow death they see their LO going through. They could have trouble describing their life as Blessed. So many Caregivers feel angry with God. Or certainly disappointed and confused over their understanding of A Loving God and His Son Jesus Christ. They question how a God could let this horrible situation exist in their lives. But,---- many of the Caregivers have a very strong belief in God and want to trust in Him for what they are going through. The patients vary all over the map as to their cognitive abilities and may have beliefs but are not able to communicate their faith. Others have just plain lost their apparent memory of their beliefs in anything. The patient does not have much hope to ever recover their memories. But---- the Caregivers have time to find God as their comforter, their counselor, and their need to develop a closer relationship with our Savior and our Lord. I feel that I am Blessed in this opportunity to care for Carol under the Lord's leadership. He is our piolot.

The A.D. person we used to know is now gone. I still love the current Carol but I miss the old Carol & realize that she is not likely to return. Another sad part is that I have now lost my own memory of who Carol used to be. I can not remember her smile, her laughter, our conversations, our 49 years of marriage. I have heard from other Caregivers that after our LO physically dies, the Caregiver usually gets the old memories back. I know that God has not forgotten us but I also have to constantly remind myself that I am still serving my Lord as his witness in these current times. It just isn’t the same witnessing as others might consider in their ministry. The sermon in our church last week spoke directly to the ears and understanding of a Caregiver. It was asking the question of “What are you hungry for.” The subject was that we are CRAVING for SIGNIFICANCE. It is good for all Christians to crave significance. Several of us agreed to this sermon’s impact on our life as Caregivers. Our significance is found in our relation ship with Christ. I was Created, Recreated and CALLED to;

Learn from Jesus
Commit to be a Servant
Move towards spiritual sacrifice (not just servitude)

You can listen or download this sermon, April 19, 2009 at:

http://rockwall.lakepointe.org/OnlineMessage/current_message.aspx

Listen to it with the heart of a Caregiver. I think you will feel BLESSED!!! bill

CAREGIVERS

2009-04-21T07:54:00.000-07:00

Have you ever thought where our country would be without Caregivers to take care of our Alzheimer’s patients in the U.S. The costs to Medicare, Medicaid, Insurance, and state programs is over $148 million for the 5.3 million cases in the U.S. The costs to the Caregivers is bigger than that because gov programs do not cover much of the Cost of home care provided by caregivers. We have spouses taking care of spouses, children taking care of parents and/or in-laws and some siblings taking care of siblings. The health and death toll among the caregivers is staggering. It is a very hard job and most of it is 24/7. I have a lady that comes to our house 3 days a week for 6 hrs/day. She is a great help to both Carol and I but it is still very exhausting to me. I also have two children and 6 grandkids in Rockwall and of course that is a big benefit.

I want to tell you a little about the Caregivers I have communicated with since 2005 through message boards on Alzheimer’s Assoc and a private Blog called thealzheimerspouce.com Other folks are mostly ladies but there are a lot of men. Our outlook on caregiving is somewhat different for men vs woman but the main ties are basically the same. We still have to deal with the memory loss, the emotional problems, the anger outbursts, personal hygiene is a major problem, especially as incontinence reaches each family. My respect for the caregivers I have met is of the highest order and I ask each reader here to pray for the Caregivers as well as the patients. One of the oldest and still best reference book is “The 36 Hour Day” which kind of tells you the total and complete involvement of taking care of the Alzheimer’s patient.

Carol is on the Prowl for BABIES

2009-04-19T14:46:00.000-07:00

Many of the experts say that late term AD patients have the mental level of a 2 yr. old child. I don’t know about that but Carol sure likes to watch and talk to young children. We purposely go to McDonalds, IHOP, and CiCi’s so that we can see the children. Sometime they are sitting closely and they seem to know that Carol loves them because they keep looking back at her and making faces when she makes faces at them. We have calling cards with “Thank you for being patient with my Wife. She has Alzheimer’s.” and I give one to the parents so they won’t think we are crazy. The results are just great. Once the mother encouraged her two girls to go over and talk to that nice lady. They came over to our booth. The smallest climbed up beside Carol and actually gave her a hug and a kiss. I just wish that Carol could have remembered it longer. We used to work in the nursery once a month and that was always a good day but I had to give it up because my severally degenerated back made me worry that I might fall when picking them up and/or carrying them. But Carol still seems to have a vague memory of our Sundays with the Babies.

CAROL ELDRIDGE AND AD

2009-04-16T13:35:00.000-07:00

Carol has had (AD), Alzheimer’s disease, since about 1996. First symptoms were loss of short term memory. Her Drs. finally ruled out other possibilities in 2003 and we were ready to accept Alzheimer’s as the cause of her dementia and loss of cognitive ability. Carol stopped driving (reluctantly) 3-4 years ago and it was very hard for her to accept. Her ability to cook, and do more than minor items around the house ended about that time. Alzheimer’s Assoc. list 7 stages AD and Carol progressed through most of them. Many patients skip around or even skip a stage altogether. Carol is now in stage #6 and moving into stage #7. You can go to the Alz.org below and read about the 7 stages.

http://www.alz.org/alzheimers_disease_stages_of_alzheimers.asp#stage5

Carol does not remember any of your names but usually recognizes your face and will try to talk to you. Unfortunately you probably won’t understand her. Conversation with her is almost impossible but she still enjoys it. She still handles eating OK and does not seem to have any physical failures like continence. I am dreading stage #7. She does like to “talk” to you and likes a hug. She loves to drive around and eat out. Church and ABF is the highlight of her week. I will try to post her “Christian testimony” soon. She wrote it as about the last thing she was able to do on the computer herself. Quit playing bridge and solitaire on computer at about the same time.She received a pacemaker in 2005 and no longer has any of the episodes of nausea, vomiting, passing out that she had experienced every month or so. Her heart was simply pausing and causing the problems. Nothing to do with Alzheimer’s apparently. I’ll be posting on frequent occasions and hope you will appreciate what Carol and I are going through. I also hope you will be able to understand the horrible results on all patients and their caregivers. It is a horrible way to die and so far that is the only outcome. I look forward to hearing from you.

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Bill & Carol